Sunday, July 25, 2010

Today is an important day.

Today, July 25th 2010, is a very important day. I declare today to be the first international "Don't Give a Shit about You Damn Attention Whore" day.

Let me explain. I live in downtown Montreal, and it is a NOISY place to live in. All day long, I am literally peppered with random noises, sights, smells and textures. Let me give you a list of the crap I've had to put up with in the last 7 days:

  • About 150 decibels worth of car horns, police sirens and jackhammers
  • A gas leak
  • A loud, red-headed, bearded dwarf
  • A man spinning on his head
  • A one-armed beggar singing Elvis hits
  • A trumpeter
  • The sight of at least three (3) puddles of vomit
  • A latino riot
  • A stab victim (Ok, that was a year ago, but still... brutal)
Your first natural reflex when seeing either of these things would be to stare longingly while your brain fully grasps its alien, mind-shattering concept. But today is international "Don't Give a Shit about You Damn Attention Whore" day, so there is no need for it.

If you see anything that exceeds the boundaries of what you should have to put up with, take a deep breath, keep your current heading and just ignore it. Today, you are free of any torment caused by an attention whore; enjoy it, because it's a once-a-year opportunity.

Here is a list of other things worth ignoring:

  • Puppeteers
  • Jugglers
  • Tap dancers
  • People who sing
  • People on stilts
  • People climbing ladders
  • Kids throwing fits
  • Anyone younger than 21 voicing an opinion
  • Noisy yellow sportscars
  • People walking around with giant heads made of papier maché
  • People pretending to be drunk and/or crazy
  • Cosplayers and furries
More car-related hate in my next post.


  1. ahahah <3, so angsty, it's loveable

  2. I missed that day! Dammit, now I have to wait a whole year to celebrate it again :P

  3. You forgot Harley Davidson motos, car stereo trying to be louder than Heavy MTL Festival...

  4. Ooo-ooo, and people blasted their car radios so everyone has to hear what god awful crap they are listening to. It's never anything good. Plus the whistlers can grate on me big time.