Friday, September 10, 2010

Bad Day? Try Bad Month... --- by arazi13

       I haven't written in a while, (of course I'm just assuming that enough people read this shit to notice) I have left most of the writing to my friend/colleague/partner in crime Max, AKA Tugboat Timmy.

Since my last post my 1 Month old laptop mysteriously stopped working and needed to be sent for repairs. (not sure what happened...)

Also, I had some health issues that made feel like this guy (except slightly less athletic... so slightly its barely worth mentioning...)

Both of these points made it a bit harder than normal to post.

Add all this to the fact that i just moved and had tons of issues with the sale of my place, not the least of which was the notary accidentally making the cheque out to me and my wife ROY (Joy). And no i will not name the bank that would not accept it, but let's say it rhymes with VD bank. Speaking of my wife ROY, a friend referred to me in a FB post recently as AVA and someone else's kid keeps calling my daughter Steve (Eve). I'm not sure what this means but in the course of a week or so all 3 of us have been gender miss-identified.

Therapy anyone??!?!

Dude looks like a fucking lady... Or does this lady look like a dude..?(I think this is a glass half empty argument.. and i never understand those...all i take away is that my glass NEEDS MORE DIET PEPSI)

Where wuz I?

Let’s move away from the rant and more to the hateful comparisons section to better illustrate how the month of august has felt to me.

 So there is this Representative from the VD bank, and he’s walking along and he hears someone calling out,

“Help help!” “Help, help!” out of the corner of his eye he sees me!

 I’m on my knees with my pants down around my ankles, my hands cuffed around a telephone pole. The rep from the VD bank comes over and says,

 “Oh man, what happened!?” 

 “Oh it was horrible, i got beat up by the tax man, my notary and the real estate agents! They beat me up! Took all my money and left me cuffed here with my pants around my ankles! But thank God you're here!”

 Then all of the sudden the VD banker unzips his fly and says,

 “This just isn’t your day now is it?!”

 i leave you with this thought.....

Captain Crunch is hillbilly Tempura.........

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